I rarely wax poetic about politics on Bums Logic but for an instance as grand as the news today I will make an exception.
Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell died today. That is a good thing.
The biggest example of why this is a good thing: Imagine being gay and your partner is serving in combat operations oversees when the unthinkable happens and they are killed in action. Under the old rules you would never be officially notified. Ever.
If you oppose the ban being overturned, think about that for a while.
I recently returned from some much needed R&R taken on the sandy beaches of the Florida gulf coast.
The trip was amazing. The water was clear and warm while the beach was clean and not crowded in the least bit. I got to lay around and really enjoy some time away from my work and home life.
Given that I was on vacation I went ahead and spent some money on things that I probably would usually not. For the first time ever I rented a wave runner, which to be perfectly honest, was a little scary at times. Zipping along at +40 MPH can make you think that should you be thrown from the vehicle, even though you are going to land on water, the shit is going to hurt. Nevertheless, I pressed on and had a field day out there on the open water tearing it up.
On top of the wave running adventure I took in the fun past time of mini-golf. I also spent some time in a rather large human maze which while somewhat fun I was ready to be out of that thing after about 15 minutes. Additionally on my trip I ate well. I am an ardent believer that the solid cornerstone of vacation travel is fantastic dining. Without good meals on your journeys, you might as well have stayed at home.
It wasn’t until I got home that I realized that all of the fun activities I enjoyed came with a price tag. Sure zipping around the maze on a wave runner while eating a waygu steak and cheese was the tits, it is also a little costly. Thankfully I am gainfully employed as a contributor for Bums Logic so I could easily afford my vacation luxuries without having to duck my landlord with the rent for the month.
Having the money to go on vacation is great but still, wouldn’t it be great to have some additional money to help finance my adventures? Sure a Holiday Inn is comfortable enough but aren’t the 1000 count sheets and jacuzzi tub in the Omni properties just a little more comfortable? Amirite?
So after looking at my bank balance and considering my income I thought about ways in which I could supplement my cash flow. After a long Sunday of watching some professional football I have come up with a fail safe plan that I am willing to share with all of you.
Since I have been writing for Bums Logic the administrators have been inundated with letters and emails from readers of the blog that have been addressed to yours truly, JrWorthy42. At the behest of my editors I have done my best to personally reply to each and everyone of them.
You asked, I answered. It is the least I could do.
However, given the immense volume of messages that are sent to me I am not able to always reply in a timely manner. If you are one of the many folks that have taken the time to write in with questions for me, please know that I am doing my best to ensure that you receive a personal reply. If it is the case that you do not hear from me personally it probably has to do with the fact that I get creeped out by some of you from time to time. In those cases perhaps it is best that you take it personally because it is you and not me.
To the guy that requested a clean pair of my underwear, why? If there is one way to make me feel uncomfortable asking for a pair of my freshly washed boxer briefs will get you sent to the front of the line for those that will never have their request met. I mean, a clean pair? Weird.
While I do my best to respond to every message I thought that answering some of the messages here on the blog would be a real treat not only for those who wrote but for every reader and fan. So without further ado,
In the past I have shared with you my amazing athletic skills and sheer physical gifts. Today I wish to share with you my, shall we say, more sensitive side. Yeah that’s right ladies and gentlemen, not only do I rival the Greek god Hermes in the sporting arena but I am also blessed to be graced with an eye for the arts just like his half brother Apollo.
Here now, on this magnificent blog, I present to you an example of my unparalleled graphic design skills. Be prepared to behold artistry the likes of which you have never seen before.
Warning to those of you that do not deal with disappointment well for if you view the image after the jump you may wish to have your eyes gouged out so that you will not have to ever see anything ever again because you know that nothing could live up to its certain and understated greatness.
In the interest of getting to know the readers of Bums Logic I submit to you our first ever poll. Please answer the question below and if you would like to expand on your answer please do so in the comments section.
After last weekend I sure know which one I prefer.
Given the onslaught of NFL updates here on BL I figure it wouldn’t be complete without giving mention to a relatively new pastime that accompanies every professional football season. Yeah that’s right, it’s fantasy football time. If you haven’t heard of fantasy football all I can tell you is that you need to leave the house more. The shit is real and it is here to stay.
Now is the time when folks gather together, whether virtual or actual, and conduct their annual fantasy football ‘draft’. While I want to say that this activity is partaken by only men the fact is, that couldn’t be further from the truth. Men and women both young and old ‘play’ fantasy football. There are entire websites as well as radio broadcasts and television programs dedicated to fantasy football. The folks that are fantasy football fanatics want to be sure that they get the best insider’s take on which players they should take in order to secure the strongest team so at the end of the season they can claim victory in their fantasy football league.
Here comes the NFL, but over the years I turned into more of a college fan, because, well, I’m a Bills fan…
Can you blame me?
In order to avoid litigation I have made my own helmet design for the professional football team located in Buffalo, NY.
As a Bills fan I have experienced nothing but disappointment. Even the most casual football fan knows about Super Bowl XXV and ‘wide right.’ Many will say that has to be the pinnacle of the disappointment. Of course those same folk can point to the fact that the Bills were an 8 point favorite in the game and should have very well beaten the Giants that evening without the help of Scott Norwood’s foot needed to kick a 47 yard field goal to win. After the game people were calling for his head for missing a FOURTY SEVEN yard field goal. Never mind that at that distance the percentage of all field goal kickers is less than 50%. To blame Norwood for the loss is disingenuous.
Scott Norwood is certainly not to blame for the next THREE Super Bowl losses the Bills endured. Are you kidding me? Four losses in a row? Again, even the most casual football fan knows that number. At least Bills have company with Vikings fans.
Yes four consecutive Super Bowl losses hurt. But do you know what hurts even more? Poor officiating. Allow me set the stage for you.